Here's my favorite song for today to listen to while you read this post.
"Baby wants a new spin, baby wants a broken heart." Love that. I love the Decemberists. I'm thinking of getting a violin to see if I can still play so I can go on tour with them.
No I'm not. I hated the violin. When first learning violin it sounds like a frozen cat going through a woodchipper. It's horrid. Your fingers hurt and the rosin you use on the bow is sticky it makes a dusty powder as you play and I could go on and on. You know what I liked best about playing violin? Getting out of school to go to competitions. I never loved school.
I didn't like school until high school, where I loved journalism class and art and my friends. I also loved the rolls in the cafeteria. I would like one of those rolls right now.
If I had to do it all again I would have rather played piano, like Ben Folds. Rockin' piano.
If I had to do it all again I would have majored in something I really wanted to do and not education because let's face it, I would have been the worst teacher ever. Mainly because as a teacher, you can't say "what the hell is wrong with you?" to a student.
If I had to do it all again I would have majored in writin'.
That is too a major.
Did you read my earlier post? It took me four attempts to correctly spell "temperament." I probably shouldn't admit that, but whatevs. You know, the Mac red-underlines 1/3 of my words because they're made up, so for a minute I thought I made that one up too. I like making up words. Superfantastic. Besides making up words, I also like to use dashes and hyphenate words, but you've probably already picked up on that. I blame Emily Dickinson and T.S. Eliot for some of my writing style. They're dead. I can blame them if I want.
"The Engine Driver" may be my favorite song tomorrow. Guess what I'm doing for next week's Tunes You Need Tuesday. Go ahead guess.
Have you ever taken a drink from a glass you thought was of Sprite and lo and behold it was water? That's the kind of soul-stirring day I've had.
The kids want me to take them to a Mardi Gras Parade Friday night. Ugh. I love where I live, but I hate where I live this time of year. The roads on parade routes close and everybody goes nuts over beads made in China that probably have lead paint. Yes, I said it. I don't like begging for beads. They're plastic, not pearls or precious gems. And don't get me started on the time we went to a parade and some people threw Tootsie Rolls. But I wouldn't mind a new set of Mardi Gras cups.
You don't know how happy I am that my iPhone has finally learned that when I type "hell" I don't mean "he'll."
Have you ever seen Loni Love do stand-up? When she said she's not a drug addict because she likes wings, not weed I almost fell off the sofa. The woman is funny and I know funny, look her up. She also said she'd rather be on Cops than Flava of Love.
Top Chef is on tonight and Paula Deen is a guest judge. I hope the challenge is for the cheftestants to use a pound of butter in each recipe and say "y'all" and "spatuler" a lot. They had Muppets on last week, so anything is possible. Plus, it's Bravo.
Do you remember when Bravo was only on for half the day and shared the channel with some other channel? I've been watching it forever. I remember back in the day watching Michael Hutchence from INXS in a movie called Dogs in Space. Yes, it's a real movie — look it up — it was the '80s, people did cocaine and weird movies were made and then run on Bravo. Oh, and Hutchence played a drug addicted singer in a band. It's like art imitating life imitating art.
I'm sleepy. Goodnight.
