Even Beyonce making an ugly face gets a 9. 

OMG I love songs. But for real, I don't listen to the radio. Ever. I don't care what's popular. I like what I like and I have good taste. These are songs (old and newish) that I can't get enough of at the moment.

1. "Ho Hey," the Lumineers

2. "Small Town Moon," Regina Spektor

3. "Dry the Rain," the Beta Band

4. "Counting Down," Nataly Dawn

5. "From a Window Seat," Dawes (I love Dawes)

6. "A Tattered Line of String," The Postal Service (The Postal Service is back, y'all)

7. "I'm Through," Ingrid Michaelson

8. "Cannonball," the Breeders (pretty much the best song for all occasions)

9. "Atlas Hands," Benjamin Francis Leftwich

10. "Billie Jean," by the Civil Wars

 

here's "Atlas Hands" because I love this song.

 

This is me.

At least this is the picture I used for anaface.com, the site that geometrically analyzes your face and tells you how pretty you are. 

I'm a 7.65. I would disagree, but it's math – whatev. 

According to anaface.com the following people are prettier than me.

Hitler is prettier than me.

Michael Jackson is prettier than me.

Mr. Bean is prettier than me.

Jesus is prettier than me, but I can't argue with that.

Still, anaface.com, I am not happy with the other three. I mean, really. Hitler? You know that's not right, anaface.com. I'm not the most gorgeous woman alive, but I'm no Hitler. And I'm even a prettier woman than Michael Jackson.

So, I've seen something called anaface.com that geometrically analyzes your face and tells you how pretty you are (aren't) and according to them, I'm a 7.65 out of 10. 

The good news is that I have great horizontal symmetry (because that's hot, y'all). 

My ears are too long for my nose.

My innerocular distance is too big for my eyes. I don't know what that means. I think they're calling me a hammerhead shark.

My nose is too wide. 

My face is too wide/short. Hell. You got me there, anaface.com.

My mouth is too wide. They're saying I have a big mouth. This is not news. 

So, in summation: I have big ears, a big nose, and a big mouth – pretty much Angelina Jolie, suckas. This just proves what I've always said, you can't trust geometry.

OMG I love fictional characters. I'm listing characters from novels and movies.

1. Rhett Butler (don't give me any of that Ashley Wilkes bullshit).

2. Nick Adams

3. Holly Golightly

4. The Dude

5. Madea

6. Bridget Jones

7. Batman

8. J. Alfred Prufrock

9. Gatsby

10. Clarissa Dalloway

I found inappropriate old Valentines to send to your very own inappropriate Valentine, you sicko.

 

Complete with my favorite* songs by each artist. These songs are all great and personal to me, so if you don't like them, whatev. 

*favorites are subject to change

 

1. The Beatles

 

2. Ben Folds

 

3. Counting Crows

 

4. The Lemonheads

 

5. The Decemberists

 

6. Natalie Merchant/10,000 Maniacs

 

7. R.E.M.

 

8. The Smiths/Morrissey

 

9. Fleetwood Mac

 

10. The Pretenders

 

 

This is going to be extremely difficult.

We may need photgraphs. You know, in case you're not familiar with any of these fellas.

 

1. Alec Baldwin

2. Andrew McCarthy

3. Jon Hamm

 

4. Jeffrey Dean Morgan

5. Gerard Butler

6. Patrick Demsey

7. Chris Hemsworth

8. Clive Owen

9. Hugh Jackman

 

10. John Cusack

So, with the exclusion of Thor, I have a bit of a type. I'm okay with that.

OMG I love actresses.

1. Katherine Hepburn

2. Cate Blanchet

3. Judy Garland

4. Meg Ryan

5. Kate Winslet

6. Charlize Theron

7. Julianne Moore

8. Holly Hunter

9. Scarlett Johansson

10. Rita Hayworth

OMG I love actors.

1. Alec Baldwin

2. Andrew McCarthy

3. Cary Grant (my all-time favorite)

4. George Clooney

5. Matt Damon

6. John Cusack

7. Hugh Grant

8. Jeffrey Dean Morgan

9. Patrick Dempsey

10. Gerard Butler