When I was a little girl I loved watching the Miss Universe pageant for the beginning portion where the contestants would come out in costumes of their nations.  Miss France might have a skirt that looked like the flag and a top made of brioche, Miss USA would be dressed as the Statue of Liberty, Miss Australia would have a koala attached to her back.  It was spectacular.  

Not only is the Miss Universe pageant still going on (despite never having contestants from other planets), I believe the costumes are even better.  The actual pageant is on the 23rd, but many of the contestants posed this week in their national costumes at the Mandalay Bay Resort in Vegas so we could have a little fabulous on our computer screens.  

Let's go to the photos.

I've never been one for tennis, but I think it would be hard to play in that train and those shoes.  Just sayin'.

Miss Kosovo, you have a little something on your…um, never mind.

"In Peru we know how to do the party.  AMIRITE?  AMIRITE?  I got the lampshade on my head and I wear the tablecloths.  Ha ha ha.  I stole your collectable plate and glued it to my belt.  Ha ha ha.  I make with the practical jokes too!"

Miss Honduras is a rare breed of tiger peacock.  She is to be feared.

The award for most ruffles while wearing polka dots goes to Miss Spain.

No one's hugging Miss Venezuela/Edwina Scissorarms tonight.  

Miss Switzerland will cut a bitch.

Miss Panama was attacked by every animal in her country.  There will be a telethon hosted by George Clooney.  Stay tuned for details.

I loaned Miss USA my Super Cougar costume.  I wear boots with it, not stripper sandals.  Tacky.

"Suck it, Miss USA!  We have wings in Albania too!  Devil wings."  

"Stupid bitches in costumes."

photos from gettyimages