When I announced this contest I had no idea it would cause such a stir. Who knew from that as far away as across town Jennifer would take camcorder in hand and go in search of what may be the flockin' tackiest house I've ever seen (flockin': def a synonym of the F word to be used around the holidays. etymology: according to Jenn, her husband and bro-in-law invented the word in this manner — Christmas + tree + cursing = flockin').
Here in Jenn's own words is her description. Enjoy and don't forget to comment.
I remembered that one street over from mine was this house that
was decorated in years past, and lo and behold, like manna from heaven,
this is what I found.
Now this lot is no more than 75×125 and every inch of it is
covered in crap! Not only are there the inflatables, the Baby Jesus and
his peeps, animated Santa waving his hand, the blinding flashing
snowflakes but hark! What's that in the garage? A sheet of plexiglass
with a plethora of more crap! With music! (The music you hear in my
video is not from my car but their house! How would you like to live
next to these freaks?)
covered in crap! Not only are there the inflatables, the Baby Jesus and
his peeps, animated Santa waving his hand, the blinding flashing
snowflakes but hark! What's that in the garage? A sheet of plexiglass
with a plethora of more crap! With music! (The music you hear in my
video is not from my car but their house! How would you like to live
next to these freaks?)
Oh and so much for being stealthy! I had already gotten some shots
and greedily circled back to get more and the homeowner walks out to
fix the gi-normous Frosty! Oops! Editor's note: please note that the garage has been turned into a life-sized diorama. This better not get out to my neighbors or that kind of crap will be all over my subdivision and I'll be forced into a life of crime. I'll be the Robin Hood of Christmas decorations. I'll steal from the tacky and give to well, an undisclosed dumpster. Or I may set them up on friends lawns for fun. Or give them to a couple of my friends way up north in Bossier City to use for shooting practice. Anymisdemeanor, at least I wouldn't have to see them anymore.
and greedily circled back to get more and the homeowner walks out to
fix the gi-normous Frosty! Oops! Editor's note: please note that the garage has been turned into a life-sized diorama. This better not get out to my neighbors or that kind of crap will be all over my subdivision and I'll be forced into a life of crime. I'll be the Robin Hood of Christmas decorations. I'll steal from the tacky and give to well, an undisclosed dumpster. Or I may set them up on friends lawns for fun. Or give them to a couple of my friends way up north in Bossier City to use for shooting practice. Anymisdemeanor, at least I wouldn't have to see them anymore.
kerryfaler.blog 
Ker-
It was my digital camera. After getting this thing for last Christmas, I am FINALLY learning how to use it. (okay you and Beth can stop laughing now!)
As far as flocking, it started when they got a flocked tree one year as chirren, and now, since they haven’t grown up that much, it’s “man, look at that flockin tree”, etc etc
Thanks for lettin me clarify!
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That’s pretty darn good! I’ve got a few (also with music) that will give that one a run for its money. I tried to take camera picks tonight, but the images didn’t translate their hideousness to film. I think I’m going to have to get out one night with the video camera. Before I do this, I need to a) find the camcorder b) locate the battery c) charge said battery and then d) figure how to use apparatus.
So, it may be a few days (cough, week) before I get something to submit. Will and I may make a night of it because there are quite a few Griswald-esque houses all over the Shreveport-Bossier metroplex that would deserve a mention. As I am battling extreme laziness and procrastination this year, don’t hold your breath.
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Dude. I tried to record my entry last night while sitting in the middle lane on Highway 59. However, the jackasses driving down the street thought I was trying to turn left (into what would have been the DITCH then ultimately the horrendous decorations)and kept friggin slowing down and flashing me. Unfortunately the only thing I recorded was me cursing at these stupid people. I will try again tonight. Just a note on the word “flock”. Back when I was a youngun’, my dad bought us our first flocked tree (probably circa 1977). Now, my mom being OCD, had a fit about the flock sprinkles that got on her carpet while bringing in the tree. (Note: we didnt tell her we were bringing this monstrosity home)So after hours of her bitching about it, my dad turned to her and said, “flock you bitch, you ruin everything”. Being 11 I thought that was the funniest thing ever. They however divorced 2 years later. Later Homies! (I am officially adopting the word homie from your stationary website that you posted. It fits me.)
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Melissa-
Love that flockin’ flock story!
Where on 59 are you talking about b/c I’d love to go check that one out! (No-not to video it,you can have it- but just to gawk at the hideousness.)
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Hey Melissa-
Is this house on 59 near the intersection of a road that rhymes with Harp? B/c if that is the one, I passed by it during daylight hours, and that’s a yardful of crap. I can only imagine how it looks at night.
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